Batman Fights a Triceratops


“Word on the street is that Falcone has sent a Triceratops to kill me. I better do some world’s greatest detecting!”

“Hey you! Know anything about the Triceratops that was sent to kill me?”                                                         “Mmmmaybe…”

*STOMP*                                                                      “Surprise, Detective, it was me the whole time!” “Ffffuuuuu….”

*CHOMP*                                                        “I swear to God, Batman, I’ll bite your head clean off! I’ll do it!”                                   “How can you speak so clearly with my head in your mouth? Oh, also, don’t swear to God…”


“SWEAR TO ME.”                                                           “Gasp.”

*SMACK!*                                                                            “You have eaten well. You’ve eaten my head’s wealth. Its spirit. Your feast is nearly over. From this moment on — none of you dinosaurs are safe.”

*KRAK!*                                                                                   “I kicked you in the eye.”

*FAK!*                                                             “I won’t kill you, but I don’t have to save you…”

*PUNCH!*                                                                                 “I must look so awesome right now…”

“Batman declares Batman the Goddamned Winner! FIST. PUMP.”                                                                               “You’re so awesome. Let’s be best friends now.”                “OK.”


Next Month: “Two For the Money!”

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